Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
