best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
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