i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
"She's seriously grinding on him while whispering into his ear, 'take me to McDonald's.'"
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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