I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
Dude, it's the frankincense and myrrh soap. Smelling like baby Jesus will get you laid.
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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