Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
