lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
He sat down, pointed at my Converse and said "I have the same shoes." I thought "I'm going to have sex with you by the end of the night."
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
