she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
soo... how was my night?
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
Randomize
