I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
