I'm going to jail i love you
Plan A DEFINITELY worked... Go with me to get Plan B??
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
