I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
i just made my gag reflex go away.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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