I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
this just has baby written all over it
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
So as I left the Australian's hotel room, I said "Welcome to America. You're going to do just fine here."
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
