I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Life is so much better after having sex.
Hippo gnu deer
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
