I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
