so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Randomize
