how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Some kids in a school bus just saw me jacking off in my car. This is how 89% of children find out about sex.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Randomize
