From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
I feel like that japanese guy who ate all the hotdogs. Except replace hotdogs with sailor jerrys. And instead of a trophy and world record I just get a hangover at work
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