Pappa wants mamma naked
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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