i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
Woke up to find my underwear in my purse to only remember I took them off at the airport
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize