Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Everyone is in jail. I'll see what i can do though
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize