Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
So vagazzling was a success
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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