Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Got paid 100 bucks to babysit a kid for five hours while hungover. I slept the whole time and threw up twice. Yes 100 bucks.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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