She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
i've created a new STD.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
