there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
The guy in front of me in lecture is using a fifth of smirnoff as a water bottle.
Nevermind, it's not water.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
Randomize
