you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize
