those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
