why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
Randomize
