I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
i opened her purse and found 4 bottles of vodka tampons and an unopened box of birth control...
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
She has an emergency bra in her purse. I'm gonna check no on the 'introducing her to my new boyfriend' box.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Please don't give away my fajitas
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