I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Can we get pizza? This is seriously not a booty call. I just really want someone to get pizza with me.
Going back to our hometown to help Gramma move. Thinking we should see if we can fuck on the desk of the homophobic coach who first introduced us while in town.
Randomize
