Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
I feel like death gave me a hand job
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Randomize
