new low: just stole a ciggarette from a bum sleeping on the side of the street.
ohh what kind?
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
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