So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I'm shutting down my vagina temporarily...it's like the last two weeks were a going out of business sale...and now it needs a break...
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I literally just want someone to fuck me and buy me cheeseburgers. I don't even want a relationship at this point. Just a chew toy and some food.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
