I made my friend ***** cry when I wouldn't let her call u for an orgy at 3am...I didn't think you'd be to happy being woke up
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
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