Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
We made a drinking game out of poaching eggs. When did our life turn into a really awesome version of Top Chef?
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
We have started to decorate penises.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
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