we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
Oh right she's pregnant - that's why all of her statuses have been uber depressing
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
