is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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