Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
I woke up with eight different shoes in my bed what the hell happened last night
Randomize
