I'm drive I can fine osifer
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
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