jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
Thanks for the hickies, asshole. I make my living as a fitness instructor. It's gonna look reeeeeeal weird if I have to wear a scarf while teaching Zumba all week.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
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