I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
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