never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
well, if it werent for her you wouldnt have gotten a handjob in the middle of the bar. so, maybe you should thank her too.
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
So you told me to remind you that you vomited 3 times in the street because you would forget so here is your reminder
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
Is there a hallmark card for "could you please slide the FUCK out of my DMs"....?
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
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