the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
I didnt realize we were having a competition in poor decision making skills
how else could I explain the last few years
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Randomize