I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
