drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
It's only funny because he thinks you had sex with him to rob him.
Randomize
