drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
No subtext here. People are naked.
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
The air was thick with penises
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
