she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
you will always have a special place in my vag
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
