Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.
I just found (and ate) a chunk of a reese's that fell between my boobs. Problem is that I finished those off 3 days ago in a drunk induced sob session... Has it really been that long since I changed my clothes?!
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Bank just called....we left my debit card in the ATM last night.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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