As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
You came out of the bathroom, said "I'M DRUNK BUT I REMEMBERED TO WASH MY HANDS!" and then insisted that she smell them.
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize
