sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
did you just send me my own nude
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
