If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Its 10:23 on a monday morning and im craving jello shots, this is a problem
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
