Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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