ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
I just saw a girl drinking wine and walking her dog in footie pajamas and a mad hatter hat. First day of the new year and I think I'm in love.
I feel like you should put up a missed connections ad for this..
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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